Combat Report: Day 1

Archangel Gabriel passes GLaDOSa a card.
El Quinto summons his Shark Army, which slowly begins swimming out of the sea and onto the Beach (?), their teeth gnashing in a horrifying symphony of Fear...
GLaDOSa deploys 2 Tanks to (30).
El Quinto deploys 3 Marines to (32).
Cho'Rand deploys 4 Police to (26).
Channel 47 deploys 2 Paratroopers to the Chamber of Deputies (22), where they land on the roof and climb in through the open Observatory Dome.
Channel 47 deploys 1 Helicopter Gunship to (3).
Channel 47 deploys 1 Helicopter Gunship to (30).
Archangel Gabriel deploys 2 Tanks to (32).
[Casualties Reported] GLaDOSa drops an Airstrike on (20), killing 2 zombies.
[Casualties Reported] Father Ambrosio drops an Airstrike on (2), killing 1 zombie.
[Shots Fired] El Quinto fires the Gunboat at (2), killing no zombies.
[Casualties Reported] Cho'Rand drops an Airstrike on (2), killing 3 zombies.
[Casualties Reported] Channel 47 drops an Airstrike on (1), killing 2 zombies.
[Casualties Reported] Archangel Gabriel drops an Airstrike on (19), killing 2 zombies.

[Casualties Reported] GLaDOSa moves his assembled Army from (30) to (20) and engages the zombies there. 7 zombies are killed and 1 Soldier is turned before being immediately cut down.
Cho'Rand moves his assembled Police from (26) to (23).
[Casualties Reported] Archangel Gabriel moves his assembled Army from (32) to (19) and engages the zombies there. 2 zombies are killed and 2 Soldiers are turned before being immediately destroyed.
El Capitan Gyro moves Himself from the Chamber of Deputies (22) to (13) by climbing out the Observatory Dome where the Paratroopers came in.
[Casualties Reported] A Zombie in (9) attacks the defenseless Farm and Labor Office Worker there and easily infects him.
A Zombie in (17) tries to enter the Chamber of Deputies (22) but finds no way in and begins methodically tearing at the walls...
Many Other Zombies move about the city in a pattern too complex to track accurately....

Transcript: While we wait for this minor calamity to pass, I will present a fact for your amusement. When the LUMP Science and Enrichment Bunker goes into lockdown mode, the air vents to the surface are also cut off. So you're not breathing real air!! We just take Carbon Dioxide out of a room, freshen it up a little bit, and pump it back in!! So you'll be breathing the same room full of air for the rest of your life! Also, when you heavy breathers go into different rooms from each other, we do have to split that room full of air up, so if you start to feel lightheaded, just shut the hell up for a while and stop being such an air-hog.

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Generalissimo of the 2nd Brigade

*Click.*
*Kkkkssshhhk.*
You think I'm not aware of our situation? You think I want to stay isolated down here? You know, I'd make a desperate effort to raise somebody in hopes of getting away from your nasty mouth Steel! But the fact is... the fact is, either we are the only ones left, or there's no one within range my puny Second World War radio signals.
*Kkkkssshhhk.*
Well! Isn't this a laugh. Zombies. Hey, GlaDDy. You still have control over that Space Melt Ray? ... Y'know what'd be really useful right now?
A building-sized robot.
That'd be really useful.
But no. SOMEONE had to crush it... Stupid flesh-based creatures...
*Kkkkssshhhk.*
Something my granddad used to tell us. You know Macumba? Voodoo. My granddad was a priest in Trinidad. He used to tell us, "When there's no more room in hell, the dead will walk the Earth."
*Kkkkssshhhk.*
Seeing as I'm... y'know, a demon, possessing every TV set in the world - I really don't have to stay for this massacre. But I will. Because this is FUNNY. Hey, Feathers - stick around. This'll be a laugh. I promise you. Besides, what've you got to lose?
*Kkkkssshhhk.*
*Click.*
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Foreign Minister

You all know me. Don't say much, but when I do, you damn well better pay attention. You want to stay alive, Chief, it's time to ante up. And we gotta do it quick, get yourselves back on a payin' basis.

I been trainin' these here sharks for just this occasion. Raisin' an army of sharks that can swim anywhere you want. Swim in the water, swim on the land. . . and they're hungry for zombie, Chief. If we can control, 'em, they'll eat zombie head, tail, the whole damn thing.

So whaddya say, Chief? Let's let the sharks do the work for us. Other wise, they just gonna come in here and tear us to pieces. It ain't gonna be pretty. Better pack your rubbers.

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Admiral

Ha ha hahahaha!

Ah, mortality. Well, humans, it's been fun... Oh, wait, no, it hasn't. It's been, quite frankly, awful. And now this idiot robot has sealed us in.

I suppose that's good for you all, but I'd really rather just fly the hell out of here before it gets turned into a nuclear wasteland. Fallout just wreaks havoc on my feathers.

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Generalissimo of the 1st Brigade

Transcript: Don't worry test subjects. Doctor El Presidente Halconero insisted that the LUMP Science and Enrichment Bunker have absolutely secure centralized, and computer controlled magnetic vault doors installed at all entrances. I'll just entomb us in here until the Foreign Intervention Forces mop up the shambling hordes outside. Of course, deploying the forces at your disposal to the Bunker couldn't hurt our odds of riding this little catastrophe out in style.

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Generalissimo of the 2nd Brigade

To the remaining government survivors of Republica de los Papayas:

I regret to inform you that we can no longer supply you with Foreign Aid Money! The reasons for this are varied and nuanced, though I shall state simply that it has come to our attention that there are no people left in your country and it was felt that the expenditure of money on a pathetic scrap heap such as yours was no longer conducive to our goals!

That said, it has not been missed by us that your nation is currently overrun with a zombie infection! We feel that such an infection might spread across the globe if unchecked! We also feel that none of us want to get anywhere near them! As such, we are willing to put a truly EXCESSIVE amount of force at your disposal so that you may deal with with the, uh, problem...yourselves!

Good luck and Gob Bless!

Combat Report: Zombie Only Phase

The Zombie Hoards enter the city from all sides, intent on securing the brains of the Cabinet Members tucked away inside the Chamber of Deputies. Will the Cabinet survive 6 days of horror? If they want to spend any of the money in their Swiss Bank Accounts, they better...

Farm and Labor Secretary Father Ambrosio and Foreign Minister Channel 47 are unable to secure enough funds for the Budget, ending the game...or does it?..